AMAZING RACE

Wrestling on our own battle cries alone depicts insatiable act. Tracing back the memories of the past, as I commemorate, I thought, I could dwell on every struggle alone, that I am used to in solving my own predicaments with no help. That I could stand up without any help and it’s easy. But, it was not easy, never been easy and I was wrong having that tenet. It was a childish act, thinking I can do everything by myself alone. I don’t trust anyone. Time goes by; I dwell on things on my own. I am afraid to step out my circle and join theirs and ask a hand. I thought I’m happy when I find solutions to every tribulation I’m facing but reality check, I am not. I surpassed every obstacle by myself alone, but why am I not happy? The aftermath was great since I found myself victorious, how come I’m not happy? How come I can’t exult since I am a victor of my own struggles? The truth is, I’ve never been a victor nor never surpassed any obstacle. For I have never learned to humble down myself and ask for a hand. Pride swallowed me and shackles were placed on me. A little voice within me keeps on wailing and wanting to be free but I did not try to listen to it since I’ve been enslaved by my own egotism.
I couldn’t see any trace on my walk, a trace of happiness and contentment. I couldn’t see the real beauty of life. I am restricted within my circle. I only listen to what my mind is telling me, but never to what my heart is conveying. For my mind is too powerful and greedy, she dominates over my heart who is weak, giver and forgiving. My life moves forth without a trace of bliss, peace, kindness, trust and love. Even in laughter, the heart is aching thus it ends in grief.
I thought of wishing I am a clock. Tic-tac-tic-tac says the clock seconds by seconds. It alarms everyone that life is moving forth towards the grand line. It endures separation anxiety all the while as it bids goodbye to every seconds that passes-by. But the clock, despite its plight, continues to leave a trace to anyone who listens and gives importance to every tic and tac. But you know what I need not to be a clock to do this thing. I only have to listen vigilantly and be aware of the little voice calling me. For the little voice was God, knocking on my door, and patiently waits for me to respond. He never leave me, he simply waited and never complained during the times that I only dwell on my circle. As I responded to the calling, the shackles vanished and little by little I start stepping out of my circle. The traces that I couldn’t see before came across so vividly. I thought, all throughout my life I will never experienced real happiness and contentment but I did. I feel so light. By the grace of God, I carry on, by his love I was able to come out and be reborn. His love endures forever in me. Trust me it’s for real.
I know it is not easy. It even took me years to realize this. But God is unrelenting and never demands on you. He simply waits for you to respond. I have wandered trying to find my life but I have failed. But when I simply surrender everything to GOD, I find the life I wanted so easily, a life grounded by God’s words and love (Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. Matthew 10:39). The joy I’ve felt was indivisible, and now, as I continue living my walk with God, I need not to worry about any trace I will leave for whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 18:4).

Friends, be sensitive and listen to the little voice who is calling you. Open your heart and life will be at its best. WITH MAN THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE, BUT WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE (Matthew 19:26).